Ignorance truly is bliss.

After the crappiest May I can remember, when the month decided to revert back to March idiocy, just in time for a holiday weekend (and in the middle of a string of shifts): upper 70's during the day and sunny.

I've seriously got to quit checking the weather reports on the days I have to sleep all day.

Acting "un-Christian" while leaving a "Christian" event...

There is "awesome", and then there is the exact opposite of "awesome". The exact opposite of "awesome" was on full, vulgar display Sunday night after a charity fundraiser.

Sunday night was the Northrise University Auction fundraiser, quite possibly the singlemost important fundraising event in which they raise a large portion of their yearly donations. Since Northrise is unabashedly a Christian university, various "Christian" type people were in attendance. Too bad they didn't leave the event.

Our friends, the Drs. Stone, have had a new car (new to them, not to the world) for less than a week. That night, it wouldn't start and the first and quickest thing to do is try to jumpstart it and see if that's the only problem. To jumpstart, one clearly needs jumper cables, so they set out in search of jumper cables. At an event of a few hundred people, someone had to have a set, right?

Wrong. See, these were mostly Newport Beach people in attendance. I don't like to stereotype people, not on humility or good conscience grounds, but selfishly because I'm trying to look less like a jerk. But stereotypes reared their ugly heads Sunday night so I have no choice. There truly is no other option.

First response to an inquiry of jumper cables, from Dr. Stone to a well-dressed young lady walking to her car:

Dr. Stone: Excuse me, miss, would you happen to have some jumper cables?

Well-dressed, sheltered and socially clueless young lady: If I spoke Spanish I would...

??????????????? WTF does THAT mean?!? I'll tell you what it means, it means sweetie needs to pull her head out of her ass and leave Newport Beach and go a little farther than Costa Mesa to experience the world (or to donate money to a Zambian university to appease her do-gooding conscience).

Second response to an inquiry of jumper cables, from the Drs. Stone's friend from Portland (a well educated, smartly dressed young woman) to a young couple walking to their car:

Portland dentist with a clue: Excuse me, do you by any chance have some jumper cables we could borrow?

Male member of couple that clearly has no automotive tendencies: *snort* No, why would I need those?

Portland dentist: Well, what would YOU do if you needed to jumpstart your car?

Male idiot: (condescendingly) I'd call Triple-A.

Honestly, I was pretty appalled at the responses of both parties. And what's with the attitude?!? A simple, "Sorry, no I don't, good luck" would've sufficed. As people leaving an event that draws people to give unselfishly from their hearts, apparently that selfless giving stops when it's your own neighbor in need and you exit the front doors.

To sweetie: I hope one day, just for your own enrichment, you are found someplace where you wish you spoke spanish because it would help you. And to the couple with Triple A- I hope one night, late, that your car breaks down and there is no mobile phone service.

Sigh, so much for not being a jerk...

Sweating to the emails.

I'm currently at our beach house, which is located in quite possibly the the only place we could ever afford a beach house- El Salvador. I've been down several times and pretty much know what to expect every time. Heat, humidity, beers in the pool.

Well, to my pregnant ass, it's unholy hot and humid and beers are still a figment of my beloved imagination for the next 5 months or so.

Things I would kill for after only 24hrs here:
-an industrial A/C for the bedrooms for the daytime.
-an on/off switch for the onshore breeze (off for when the guys surf, on for my sanity when they're not).
-a machine that COOLS the pool, because by midafternoon, it's a bath tub.
-ice.

But some cool highlights:
-floating in the pool and getting to lay on my stomach on a pool float.
-grilled cheese sandwiches.
-Getting a new A/C unit for the downstairs (you better work, you expensive piece of machinery...)
-eating mangoes from the tree while sitting at the built-in dining area in the pool.
-sleeping a combined 12hrs last night.
-Costco pizza for dinner.

But enough about my trip!!! Let's get to the REAL reason I would write from Central America!

While checking my junk mail this morning, I got an email from the Los Angeles Times with the subject reading: Why have we stopped sending you emails?

???

Um, you didn't. You just sent me one.

Honestly, whoever came up with that email campaign should be docked about $0.50 in pay because a little carefully applied logic and thought would've made the newspaper look a little less idiotic. But now, there's no way I'm renewing with them (even though I never subscribed in the first place?)- they don't use common sense. And as I've said in the past, so boldly and with shocking consequences, I don't do well with people that don't use common sense.